The First Annual Somewhere Over Dwayne Bowe Week 6 Fantasy Football Awards

Week 6. The fantasy season is now taking shape. You know who the contenders are (in my league this year, "Me") and you know who the contenders aren't, (in my league this year, "Everyone Else"). The surprise success stories are looking a little less flukish, and Jake Delhomme still has a giant fork sticking out of his back. And, having done a Power Poll just two weeks ago, I'm in need of some filler material. Seems as good a time as any to break out The First Annual Somewhere Over Dwayne Bowe Week 6 Fantasy Football Awards!!!

The Rudi Johnson Award for "Backup Running Back Who Torpedoed The Career Of The Starter"
Goes to Ray Rice. Two weeks ago, he was still listed as the #2 on their depth chart, thanks to the steady presence of Willis McGahee. But Yahoo ranks him as the 11th best player so far this year, and he's second in the NFL in yards from scrimmage.

As an aside: the "pass to the HB" offense is going to be the Next Big Thing in football. Take an elusive running back, move him outside of an area where the front 7 are right in front of him, give him time to get going before guys are hitting him, and watch the fur fly. This has dominated in video games for years now. Now, it's working for the Ravens--who might not be quite up to the #2 I gave them in the Power Poll, but are right in the thick of the toughest division in football right now.

(Also, McGahee ranks only two spots below him. Rice has 67 points to McGahee's 63. Dangerous combination to have to deal with. Does anyone see Baltimore keeping Willis past this year though? Me either.)

The Marshall Faulk in 2005 Award for Least Effective Once-Elite RB
Goes to LaDanian Tomlinson. Believe me, I loved LDT three years ago. I rode him to the title game two years in a row. Now? A first round pick has gotten you less than 100 yards on the season. And if he's on your roster, you're contemplating where you can find a fix of heroin right now.

The Craig Whelihan Award for Quarterback You Would Never Dream Of Starting, Regardless Of The Matchup
Goes, predictably, to JaMarcus Russell. My God, someone actually evaluated this guy and decided he was the best player available in the draft. Al Davis made the executive decision that this guy was a better player to have than Adrian Peterson. Yes, you read that right. Raider fans, feel free to sob quietly in the back for the remainder of the column.

(The thing nobody is mentioning--the 2007 draft produced the Bizarro Class of 1983. Remember how that was the draft class that produced John Elway, Jim Kelly, and Dan Marino? The 2007 draft gave us JaMarcus Russell, Brady Quinn, Trent Edwards, and Tyler Thigpen. Just brutal.)

The LaDanian Tomlinson Award for Best Performance By A Player Stealing A More Famous Player's Name
Steve Smith 2.0. The Giants one. Yep, he's a legitimate superstar now, and he's a three-touchdown game against the Cowboys from making the leap to superduperstar. Enjoy the ride, everyone who drafted him in the 15th round.

The Kurt Warner Award for Best Performance By Someone 95% Of The World Thought Was Dead
Goes to Cedric Benson. There were signs at the end of last year, but did anybody see this coming? And this past weekend, when I among everyone benched him against the devastating Ravens defense, he torched them. Dude's for real. Glad to have him on my team.

(Am I gloating? You bet your ass I am. You don't get many chances to gloat in fantasy football. For every champion, there are at least 7 guys wondering what the hell just happened. Take them happily.)

The 2008 Detroit Hello Kitties Memorial Award for Defense You Absolutely, Positively Must Stack Up Against Every Single Week
This one is shared by Kansas City and Oakland. Kansas City is averaging over 400 total yards against per game, while half of the NCAA Top 25 are wondering if they might be able to do better in the NFL than this alleged team. Oakland is almost as bad, but is buoyed into a share of this award by the fact that JaMarcus ensures that their offense will put up enough three-and-outs to keep the defense on the field.

The Tom Brady Award for Unsung Fantasy Assassin Of The Year
Goes to Peyton Manning. Everyone knows that Purple Jesus is the top-ranked player this year. Very few would guess that Manning is currently #2. It kills me to say that he's currently slaughtering Drew Brees, production-wise. In his eleventh year, Manning has discovered the rare sixth gear. Not an easy feat.